Taileaters explores lucid dreaming, out of body experiences, and aspires to create a more holistic way of understanding yourself. Taileaters was created to help individuals who are seeking answers to the deeper questions about reality with the goal to find answers and to continue their journey to the realization of the Self.
Lee Adams created Taileaters to document and share his personal journey through the hard and complex questions that he has faced. He found the ouroboros as a symbol of inspiration in his life because of the personal connection he felt with the symbol itself and through the process of learning what it represents. The ouroboros (taileater) indicates a process of birth, death, and rebirth that takes place in all of our lives, each moment of each day, when we sleep, and when we physically transform into what is after our physical death. The power that the ouroboros acts on as symbol is profound as its meaning is great, but ultimately it implies the journey to the realization of the Self. Taileaters use the Ouroboros as a symbol to represent their dedication to understanding and learning about this process that affects us all. Lee’s hope is to share what he learned through this process with others.
We hope that you will enjoy reading about our philosophies and ideas. We also hope that it will inspire you to seek knowledge in yourself and in others so that you too can find truth in yourself. If this mission resonates with you personally and you would like to become a contributor to this mission we ask that you join our community online.
Remember that growth is a process. While you take part in the conversation and view our content in this community, we ask that you be patient with us as we evolve or expand on topics that interest us.
“I live, I die, I learn, I forget, I do it all again.”
“But if the life-mass is to be transformed a circumambulatio is necessary, i.e., exclusive concentration on the centre, the place of creative change. During this process one is “bitten” by animals; in other words, we have to expose ourselves to the animal impulse of the unconscious without identifying with them and without “running away”; for flight from the unconscious would defeat the purpose of the whole proceeding. We must hold our ground which means here that the process initiated by the dreamers self-observation must be experienced in all its ramifications and then articulated with consciousness to the best of his understanding.” – Carl Jung
Out Team’s Biographies
My desire to understand consciousness started twenty-six years ago. I was eight years old and riding with my father when he suddenly passed out. I was taught how to drive at a young age, and I grabbed the wheel and moved it to the side of the road, thankfully missed a tree. My father came back to consciousness – and never realized the danger we had narrowly avoided. Though I didn’t understand at the time the psychological troubles that plague our communities today through depression and drug use, at this point I did see that something inside each of us can be changed and altered in strange ways which fundamentally alter who and how aware of our environment we are.
At the age of twenty-two, unbeknownst to me, my individuation process had started. I had just finished a book given to me from a friend as a celebratory gift called Mozart’s Brain and the Fighter Pilot written by Richard Restak – a clinical professor of neurology at George Washington University Medical Center. The book was given to me because my friend saw the words “Fighter Pilot” and thought that would be a great gift because I had just got awarded a full-ride scholarship from the United States Navy to become a pilot. The book had little to do with being a fighter pilot but was more about taking an introductory look into psychology and neurology of the human brain. This book inspired me to think more about my childhood experiences with my father, and made me question many aspects of religion which were hard for me to face. My dreams were significantly affected due to this sudden change in my way of conscious thinking.
As long as I can remember I have been able to become aware in my dreams. As a child, I would often tell my mother about my dream experiences with great detail. I cherished my dreams and as I grew up, and realized that being able to lucid dream was not something that everyone knew how to do. It was something special that I had, a gift. I did not fully understand how to use this gift, but I did my best to respect the dream world and listen to what it had to share with me.
At nineteen I enlisted the military, and my dream life got pushed to the side. I was working long hours and in a high-stress environment where dreaming was the least of my worries. I often had little time to sleep or think about things outside of work. I worked hard and gained rank, and I eventually applied to a commissioning program to become an officer and was accepted for a scholarship program which would provide me a college education. It was at that time I received my friend’s gift, the book, and things started to change.
I was working night shift and was sleeping during the days. One day I awoke to my friend, who was also my roommate, jumping on my back and holding me down in my bed. I tried to move but couldn’t, and yelled at him to get off of me. He pushed harder and started to breathe into my ear. I swung to hit him, and as I did, I found myself alone in my room. I felt confused and scared of what just took place as it seemed so real, but it wasn’t a dream. I tried to brush this off as just an odd dream experience, but the events continued to take place.
Each night I would have an unwelcome visitor: a shadow-like form that would come into my room and physically attack me. I eventually got so tired of this happening that I started to fight back and in one final battle I managed to consume the being into me. As I did so, I was able to walk through my bedroom door into a reality which seemed to exist past my typical lucid dreams. I later learned to identify this experience as sleep paralysis which changed my fundamental view of reality, consciousness, and what I thought I knew. It inspired me to study psychology and read everything I could on consciousness and dreams.
After talking with one of the professors who taught religious studies about my overly aggressive dreams where creatures seemed to attack me, he encouraged me to try instead to understand its desires rather than fight it. Accepting the fearful manifestations in dreams was not something I had thought about before, and I figured it would be worth trying. A few nights later I fell asleep and was able to consciously exit my body and found myself face to face with the terrible fear that manifested in the dream as a brain-eating zombie. As the zombie came closer to me with its apparent desire to eat my brain, I decided not to attack it but to allow it to bite me. As it did it suddenly stopped. It had changed into what looked like a copy of myself. I asked this copy to sit down and to talk with me a moment, and it did. I asked what was wrong and it said it was unsatisfied. As we spoke another copy appeared in the distance. I invited it also to join us. As it sat the two copies merged into each other and then into me, and I suddenly awoke. As I got out of bed, I felt changed. I didn’t fully understand what had changed in me, but it felt like it was something substantial.
I was first introduced to Carl Jung’s work on archetypes during my studies in psychology. My college professors could not relate to my dream experiences – however, they did understand some of Jung’s work on archetypes, specifically the shadow. They expressed how the shadow was a copy of ourselves, the most profound darkest aspects of who we were and that if we were to continue growing as a person, we would need to identify with it and merge with it. I found the relationship between Jung’s shadow archetype and my dream experiences to be very clear. It seemed in my dream experiences that they were something that could be experienced on a metaphysical level.
As I continued my work as an undergrad for my psychology degree, I started my directed study on dreams and consciousness. I read books on lucid dreaming, dream psychology, and general neurology and reached out to individuals who studied dreams professionally in hopes to learn more. Ryan Hurd, who runs the website dreamstudies.org, provided me with mentoring that made a significant impact on my perspective of dreams. He instilled his passion for dream research and a passion for understanding dream analysis from a Jungian perspective that I actively use on my own dreams.
After college I was required to go back to active duty for the military; however, my passion for dream exploration never stopped. I started a blog, and a podcast called I Am Ubermensch which interviewed book authors and experts on dreams and altered states of consciousness. Due to the time requirements for the military, I was unable to continue the podcast. I did however try to continue to educate military personnel on the importance of understanding the self by instructing meditation classes while on deployment and out to sea as a representative of the Buddhist tradition as a religious minister for the Navy. I also continued my education through books focused on altered states of consciousness and psychology.
In 2014 I was injured in the military which resulted in me having chronic pain in my lower back and hips. I pushed through the pain for three years, and I fought with the idea of staying in the military even though I had pain from standing long periods of time and increased stress. After reflecting on the choice of exiting the military and getting the help I needed or staying in and pushing through the pain, I had a dream which clearly instructed me that if I were to continue forward in the military, the result would be my death. I decided that night that it would be best for me to get out of the military and to get better mentally and physically.
In 2017 I medically retired from the military. I decided that I would spend my time continuing my education by focusing on researching dreams and consciousness. My goal was to learn more about my dream experiences, altered states of consciousness, and to explore the unconscious and how I could use that knowledge to help myself understand the changes that were happening in my life. I want to assist others going through similar changes eventually.
Since attending college for my undergraduate degree and going back into active service, my dreams did not stop. I continued to have dreams which explored a state of consciousness that seemed to extend past my physical body. I would often dream of exiting my body, flying to unknown locations and speaking with people who I had never met before. I reflected on the notion that this was all aspects of my unconscious self and continued to look for the themes which represented the archetypes that Jung described in his work. I wanted to expand my education in an academic setting by attending John F. Kennedy University with my focus being in Consciousness and Transformative Studies.
I started Taileaters which focuses more on my dream work and my education into Jungian symbology and explored some of my personal views on the subject. Oddly, the symbol designed as the logo for the website I received in a dream before I understood the Ouroboros and the symbology that it represented. With this website, I also encouraged others to share their experiences and knowledge with others by building it around a community for mature consciousness explorers. Through the community, I was introduced to Joseph Campbell’s work on The Hero’s Journey and found his work to relate to my own dream experiences closely. I reviewed my dreams from the past up until the present moment and found strong relationships to the theme of the journey in many aspects. I have actively been working on a short autobiography about my dream experiences in relation to Jungian dream analysis and symbology as well as Campbell’s work.
While attending John F. Kennedy University, I took a class on the psychology of dreams which was taught by my long-term mentor Ryan Hurd. In the course, we specifically were required to read Jung’s collective work on dreams and Freud’s “The Interpretation of Dreams” and provide introspection from both aspects. Freud’s views on dreams intrigued me to explore more about dream analysis through the eyes of both Freud and Jung and how I can use the alternative perspective to gain a broader picture of the underlying message. While diving into Jung’s collective works, I started to grasp the individuation process which closely resembled The Hero’s Journey that Campbell discussed in his work. On top of all of this, while discussing altered states of consciousness with authors on my podcasts, I found themes inside their descriptions and artwork representing those experiences to closely represent the same theme. Viewing additional perspectives on consciousness and their underlying themes provided me as a revelation in my mind as I suddenly saw the same idea played out over and over again through all cultures, religions, and practices, and even in my own life.
I continued my education in the Consciousness and Transformative Studies but found my attention in the class work to be very directed explicitly towards Jung and his work in individuation as it applied to my own life. I wanted to explore more in this area and took a class on Archetypal Mythology which studied the symbolism in myths present and past. While in the class we watched videos, which featured Michael Meade who is the founder of the Mosaic Multicultural Foundation and was an adjunct faculty in depth psychology at Pacifica Graduate Institute. After watching his videos, I was blown away by Meade’s level of knowledge in symbology and started to research more about Pacifica and the classes that your team offered.
From the perspective of my personality and my life choices, it is hard to understand how I got to the place I am currently. I am a grounded individual in that I can hold a steady job, I can respond to high-stress environments well, and I performed well in the military. I am self-determined and an entrepreneur and able to successfully run my own business while in the military and out. There is still an aspect of myself that seems to contradict all that, and that is this calling that I have to complete a process that started in that car with my father. I have an unquenchable desire to understand the nature of reality and in that understand my true self. Though I can’t fully explain why I have the desire to “find myself,” it still exists, and I can see that I am not alone in this process.
I see my educational need to continue to learn more about Jung, symbology, and the individual process as a calling more than a desire. The steps that got me to where I currently am are not caused by my conscious choices. It feels more like a wind pushing me in a direction that I can choose to resist or I can flow with it. From everything that I understand up to this point of the individuation process, this is taking place regardless of if I want it to or not. My goal is to continue my education and to focus on what is important to me, to learn more about this process by studying depth psychology. I am determined to not only understand this process for myself but to ultimately complete The Hero’s Journey by returning from my adventure and share knowledge with others. I truly desire to take part in your school and to be allowed to learn from some of the greatest minds who have also made this journey and can help mentor me to understand more about who I am as I find my true self.Lee Adams
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